Have you ever felt guilty of upsetting someone unintentionally?
It was my ninth week at the Academy of Living Acting class, and many actors had taken a leave of absence that day.
My character is a disturbed young girl who is defiant of authority figures and will act out aggressively towards anyone who tries to tell her what to do.
Due to the absence of some of the actors, I had to play my role with another actor from the cast. It did not bode well, as he could not handle my character.
I could see the signs that he was terrified of my character and decided not to continue the verbal abuse.
I froze, and the film director asked me why; I said the guy was shaking from head to toe.
This incident upset me as I never meant to make this guy uncomfortable. Although this is only acting, I realised that not everyone can deal with the dysfunctional behaviour of my character.
I apologised, and he thanked me for my understanding.
The guilt did not leave me as I broke down and told my mother when I saw her.
It’s amazing how I recognised the discomfort and how this could have impacted another person’s mental health. Some people would shrug it off as nothing to show off.
We must be emotionally aware of others by observing their body language and respecting their boundaries.
I have seen people in contact sports who are supposed to be walking someone around in a fight but have decided to show off and beat them because of ego. They have gained nothing.
When your ego gets in the way of somebody else’s progress, it has a ripple effect that upsets the balance.
We already live in a selfish world, but we could protect those around us by letting go of our pride and becoming a better example.
In everything, there must be a balance.
Natalie Bleau
The Scripture of Balance