IT WAS ALL ABOUT ME

December 2, 2023
2 min read

When I choose to withdraw from social interactions,
reject the assistance of healthcare experts,
opt out of celebrating Christmas with loved ones,
and cancel all my scheduled commitments for the week,
It becomes a time solely dedicated to me.

Label me selfish or self-centred if you must, but I perceive it as safeguarding my well-being from the external realm and striving to preserve my inner peace.

In my previous writings, I have expressed my tendency to find happiness in avoiding gatherings that might potentially trigger negative emotions within me.

However, this inclination has inadvertently made me feel disconnected from others.

Today, I received a message urging me to step out of my comfort zone and give things a chance, assuring me that if things become overwhelming, I always have the option to retreat home.

I decided to give my mother a call, informing her of my intention to join the family for Christmas festivities. 

I took full responsibility for the situation, acknowledging that the fault solely rested on my shoulders.

Upon reflection, I realised that there was nothing inherently flawed about any member of my family. 

The issue stemmed from my inability to accept the aspects that were beyond my control.

I now understand the importance of embracing everyone’s uniqueness and cherishing them for who they are.

I never considered myself superior to anyone; instead, I sought perfection in others, oblivious to the fact that we all possess imperfections.

Why do we obsess over the imperfections of those we hold dear? 

Although my family members may have their own contrasting traits, their unwavering loyalty assures me that they will stand by my side during challenging times.

Perhaps I am not the epitome of a perfect sister, daughter, niece, or aunt. 

Therefore, it is my responsibility to rise above and become a better individual, initiating the necessary transformation.

Grudges cannot be clung to indefinitely; they must be released. 

We must learn to relinquish the past, for it belongs in its place, behind us.

In everything, there must be a balance.

Natalie Bleau

Scripture of Balance 

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