Everyone makes mistakes in life; it is all part of growing and individual learning.
What we learnt from our parents was more or less the same things that they went through in their childhood and so begins the cycle.
As the generations went by, we slowly began to change the way we behaved towards our children.
Some children were spoilt rotten, and others fared well.
You can blame yourself as much as you like for the things that you regretted doing in your past but now it is time to move on from it.
However, there are some people who are stuck in that cycle hence why there are a lot of adults that are pretty messed up.
I have wasted so much time beating myself up over things I could have done differently. Recently I have managed to break free from this torment as it serves no purpose.
Sometimes you have to go through your own life experiences to be able to appreciate the lesson learned.
We try to protect others, from repeating behaviours that traumatised us, but sometimes by doing this, we are not giving them a chance to find themselves.
The worse part of mistakes is when it comes back to haunt us. It can become malignant and eventually destroy our futures by dwelling.
We end up punishing ourselves, unnecessarily, for the rest of our lives.
We are not living in the present, we are living in the past, condemning ourselves for something that cannot be undone.
We are never moving forward, we are stuck in the yesterday and struggling to remain in the moment.
This kind of unhealthy behaviour leaves us shackled to the past. We need to forgive ourselves and move forward in order to experience true healing.
It is not easy to let go of the guilt, it suffocates you. The downfall is that you live your life punishing yourself.
In some cases, psychodynamic therapy or CBT can be used to make us recognise this unhelpful behaviour.
Sometimes we say or do things when we get mad. In our state of anger, we are not willing to accept that we were wrong.
Anger can affect our judgement and cause us to act irrationally. We remain stubborn. We cannot see past the grudges that we hold against others.
I am guilty of all charges. During the mentally painful times of the pandemic lockdown, I have connected with myself, thoroughly, for the first time.
I got to know myself better and discovered who I am, my purpose, and what I really want out of life.
I have been studying hard and trying to recondition my mind with knowledge and positivity.
At times I still beat myself up over things as my mind refuses to switch off.
I find it useful to go back to the serenity prayer.
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can
and the wisdom to know the difference.
In everyday there must be a balance.
Natalie Bleau
The Scripture of Balance
