There are some people in this world that feel that the only way they can feed their ego is to try to take control of another’s way of feeling and thinking.
I have always been an independent thinker which is why I have a dim view of marriage. Personally, I don’t want to be anyone’s slave and lose my free will.
This is just my demented view as I don’t want to lose sight of self.
When we were children, we looked to our elders for guidance and support. We relied on their sound judgement in order to figure out right from wrong.
What we learned was not just down to our parents’ protection, but there were other influences such as friends and teachers.
When we become adults, we have the responsibility to think for ourselves.
I have learnt a lot in my life about choices.
All the decisions and choices I made, after leaving home, were based on the fact that I wanted full control of my life.
I could never be the submissive type and will not tolerate being told what to do.
The idea of having children is sweet, but only stretched as far as my imagination. It was a dream for some, but the reality of a dependent was horrifying.
Marriage was far away from reality as I had a fear of losing my identity by being seen as belonging to another.
I view myself as an individual, a separate entity to anyone else. The only way I belonged was to my parents when I was a child.
The choice I made left me with no doubt, that I will never enter into any complicated situations, and I am very honest about that.
Living with someone would be a disaster as I would have many reasons to argue. People have different standards to the way I chose to live.
I was told I would have to prepare to adjust my life to accommodate. Experience has told me otherwise. I am not willing to change the clinical way I live for anyone. I love my own space and living with someone would make me very dissatisfied and unhappy.
I couldn’t even spend too much time with anyone, as I have a voice for things that matter most to me and would not want to waste it arguing about things that don’t matter to me.
This is my harsh reality and at this stage in life I do not wish to change that.
I am the type of person that would rather stand alone, than rely on someone to stand up for me. I have God given strength and wisdom to be able to face my problems.
My friends say I am brave to speak out for myself. It does not take bravery it takes self-love and self-respect.
ONE DAY THEY WILL FIND THEIR VOICE!!
I am not forcing anybody to change the way they are, if they are happy to be the silent partner for a quiet life, that’s their choice.
You don’t have to argue to get your point across if that other person respects and cares enough they would just hear you out.
If many people stood up for themselves people who bullied them would lose all their power.
I do to an extent, understand a woman who respects her husband as head of the family. That’s fine if he is actually capable of living up to that role. Respecting her and treating her with care.
It is comforting to know that some people do have balanced, healthy, relationships and friendships, where both people are helping each other by giving them space to grow.
Respect is a vitally important part of a relationship. I have a rule that in a relationship if someone swore at me then that’s when my level of respect starts depleting as they have crossed the line.
I swear when I am wound up enough. But it is not part of my vocabulary amongst a lot of my friends.
Then come the boundaries….
Don’t allow anyone to pressurise you into doing something that does not sit well with you. Nobody is worth losing your morals and values over.
There are people who will think you are a pushover because you have never voiced your feelings.
You should never be afraid to say NO even if they dare to question your decision. You are not under any kind of contract that says your will is not your own.
Today I have no regrets about my status in life. I am doing what I need to do to help others. I am living passionately for my purpose.
As long as I look after my Mental and Physical health, and my family are okay I am happy.
I am not much of a materialistic person as long as I have the roof over my head and food on my plate, I am content.
I don’t have any great expectations only what I can do to encourage and help others that are struggling with their thoughts and feelings.
Every day I try my best to manage balance in every aspect in my life.
In everything there must be a balance.
The Scripture of Balance