I honestly believed that I truly let go of all my resentments that I held on to in the past. I have recently found some coming back through the cracks. I realised that people still have a negative effect on me. The reason being, they have not changed their toxic, obstructive behavioural patterns.
You could say that it is not my problem, as it is not affecting me on a personal level, but if you feel the need to protect the people that become victims it has then become my problem.
I am not perfect, but I try my best to live an honest decent life. I am not out to do anyone harm.
I have my own mental health difficulties so why would I want to add more madness into my life.
I believe my job is to love and protect those who are vulnerable even if it means sacrificing my peace.
We live in a broken world; people will try to bring someone else down by making themselves out to be the victim, by emotional blackmail or trying to defame other’s characters on social media.
I am sure most people try to avoid such people, as being in their presence is suffocating. But sometimes we must tolerate them for the sake of others who frequent themselves with them.
I have acquaintances who rarely contact me until they need something, whether it be to vent their frustrations, money, or even advice when they find themselves in a difficult situation.
It is all about them!!
I know that they are trying to use me as all they do is take.
I am trying my best to balance out my thoughts where these subjects are concerned.
Personally, blackmail or sob stories will not work with me as I have learnt to ignore it.
I can turn a blind eye to things like this, but not when it is around people that I am invested in.
I am sure people who are used to be taking advantage of, would feel guilty if they did not help. They use their hearts and not their heads,
I will not give anyone permission to destroy my equilibrium at my expense.
People can curse me to hell and back, that will neither move me nor have any effect on my life
For me to be a victim of a tongue lashing, you would have to first work out whether I care about you and what you have to say.
You would have to play an important role in my life to even move me.
Now that becomes a resentment for me,
I know this message could make you see me as harsh, but I have learnt to balance my priorities for others.
The people that are close to my heart, they are very few, they know who they are.
For me to maintain a balance I must look out for those who I genuinely care about, and who are constant in my life.
For me to do this is to keep away from toxic, negative behaviours and to protect those who get sucked into their vacuum.
In everything there must be a balance.
Natalie Bleau
The Scripture of Balance
